Learn Roleplay
Have you ever wanted to bring your sexual fantasies to life with your partner? Maybe you’ve always thought about an imaginary scenario but didn’t know how to explore it in a safe and fun way in real life. This is where sexual roleplay comes into the picture. It can be a game-changer if you want to try something new in your sex life.
But in order to be safe and enjoy yourself during roleplay, you should know a few things about how it works. This article will be a guide to sexual roleplay, exploring the key elements for a successful session with your partner(s).
You should be aware of communication guidelines, barriers, how to create and play characters, setting locations, costumes, and more.
Keep reading to get the rundown, and stick around to the end to get some ideas for roleplay scenarios that you can try out!
Establishing Communication
One of the most important aspects of safe, consensual sex is good communication. This is why it’s one of the first things you should establish with your sexual partner(s). Knowing how to communicate in the heat of the moment will help you to be clear about your wants and needs. It will also help you to establish boundaries so that you don’t get hurt, emotionally or physically.
One thing that most people employ in roleplay is a set of safe words. Safe words are pre-established words or word phrases that a partner can say during sex to indicate a desire to stop, pause, or slow down. Many people associate safe words with BDSM. But they can actually extend to any kind of sexual interaction where you want to create boundaries.
Safe words might even help to remove some pressure if it’s your first time practicing roleplay. You can establish funny or lighthearted safe words that will make you feel grounded when you use them.
Depending on what you and your sexual partner talk about prior to the roleplay session, safe words could mean different things. But the important thing is that each party honors these boundaries by not crossing or ignoring them during roleplay.
Navigating Barriers
Keep in mind that it’s natural to feel shy, embarrassed, or even a little bit silly at first. But this is why it’s important to create a judgment-free zone for roleplay. Don’t hesitate to start small if sexual fantasies and scenarios don’t come naturally to you.
There’s nothing to be ashamed of, and removing the expectations may even bring you and your partner(s) closer to one another.
There may be barriers in roleplay if one or more partners has experienced some kind of sexual trauma. Or barriers might arise simply due to individuals meeting a learning curve when it comes to sexual communication.
Regardless of your circumstance, use your barriers as an opportunity to pause before jumping into roleplay. You can take a little time to have open, shame-free conversations with sexual partners about your anxieties, anticipations, and other feelings.
Setting Goals
Before you start playing, you and your partner should establish what the end goal is with this adventure.
Are you looking for something to spice up your sex life within a long-term relationship? Are you dating someone long-distance and want a more creative way to engage in cybersex while you’re physically separated?
For some people, the goal may be just to have fun and try something new. And that’s totally fine, too. By setting a goal, you can consider how seriously you want to commit to the characters of your roleplay. At the end of the day, try not to put too many expectations on fantasies, as they’ll suck all the fun out of them.
The Importance of Fantasies
Once you’ve talked about boundaries, safe words, barriers, and roleplay goals, it’s good to dive into fantasies. Everyone has a different idea of what an arousing fantasy looks like. For some, it might involve implementing toys and trying out kinks. But for others, a fantasy might just be pretending you’re someone else for the night.
Creativity is very important when it comes to a successful roleplay scenario. Fantasy relates to the setting and characters that you’ll employ, as well as the dynamic. Before you can get to character creation, costumes, and other scene-setters, you should explore some fantasies.
Have you always wanted to explore a sex-with-stranger fantasy? Is it your secret fantasy to do it in a library? If so, follow your imagination with your partner(s) and brainstorm to find the perfect fantasy. Once you’ve established the type of scenario you want, you can explore what it’s like to get into character and visit a new realm.
Playing and Creating Characters
Now that you’ve done the planning, it’s time to bring your fantasy to life. This is the part where you give your roleplay characters their own names, personality traits, and style.
For example, in a library roleplay scenario, you might want to think about what a librarian would say. And your partner might want to think about how a library patron would respond in this made-up scenario. Consider the characteristics that make the fantasy seem real for the sake of enhancing the sexual encounter.
If you end up choosing a character that already exists, like someone from a movie, it should be slightly easier to mimic them. And don’t be afraid to practice getting into character with your sexual partner(s).
Try things out to get a feel for how the sexual conversation will start (or will it even involve words?). There are a million possibilities, and you won’t know until you step your feet into the water.
Setting the Location
The second part of bringing the fantasy to life is setting the scene. You don’t have to create an entire movie set in your bedroom to make the fantasy feel real. However, adding some creative touches may go a long way in helping you to get into character and play along.
Some options include dimming the lights, setting up some candles, or even burning incense for aroma. As for creative environmental changes, bring in some props to make the fantasy more life-like.
You might even find that the sexual roleplay scenario works better if you start outside of the bedroom altogether. For example, it might start in the car on the way home. Or, it might begin with a conversation with your partner in the grocery store. You can really draw out the foreplay with conversational innuendos that build up anticipation until you get home to your bed.
Choosing Costumes
The first step of establishing costumes is deciding whether or not you even want to wear them. While sexual roleplay is a great opportunity for costumes, special lingerie, and other garbs, these things certainly aren’t a necessity. You can still enjoy a fulfilling fantasy scenario in something as basic as your birthday suit.
But, if you’re comfortable enough, an outfit that matches the personality or occupation of your roleplay character could make things interesting.
“Sex with a stranger” fantasies might have costumes as simple as clothes you wouldn’t normally wear. Or if you’re doing a librarian fantasy, for example, you might don a pair of glasses and a cardigan to “look the part”. Some people even employ dominatrix outfits to fulfill BDSM fantasies, which can get pretty creative.
The bottom line is to make sure that you are comfortable in whatever you’re wearing. You certainly don’t want to put on an overly complicated costume that you struggle to remove when it’s time to engage.
Example Scenarios for Sexual Roleplay
And now that you know how to prepare for sexual roleplay and set up your scenarios, let’s consider a few examples.
Stripper Fantasy
Although this fantasy is pretty common, that doesn’t mean it’s not still arousing. This fantasy doesn’t require a ton of props or extra incentives. You simply need to be willing to play the part of someone who’s paying you to take off your clothes. This can be a really fun and exciting fantasy for any gender to act out.
Let your partner be your customer, and have them pretend to hand you tips as you give them a lap dance. You can really have some fun upping the ante and teasing your partner as you show them a little bit, then more.
Star-Crossed Lovers
This roleplay scenario is for all the romantics at heart. You don’t have to be Romeo and Juliet per se, but you can create a fantasy where you and your partner are destined to not get together. The anticipation and rule-breaking of getting together in this scenario will make it all the more enticing.
Masseuse and Client
This is a very relaxing and arousing roleplay scenario that might involve some props. Let one partner be the masseuse and the other partner be the massage receiver. You can bring in aromatic oils, candles, and even costumes if you’re feeling up to it.
Queen/King and Servant
This roleplay fantasy plays into dominant and submissive roles. One partner is in charge and the other must bend to their will. You can get into costume as royalty and peasant, charging up the mood as you go along.
Final Thoughts
When it comes to sexual roleplay, make sure that you have open conversations about boundaries, safe words, fantasies, and specifics. Have fun bringing your fantasies to life!
References
https://hellogiggles.com/love-sex/sex/beginners-guide-to-role-play-sex/
https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/sex/a12435463/how-to-role-play/
The Beginner’s Guide to Role-Play
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Safeword
https://www.yourtango.com/2014207426/sex-love-valentines-day-30-role-playing-ideas-couples